🧀 The Very Serious History of Cheese Lovers Day
(A Totally Professional, Definitely Scholarly Investigation)
(A Totally Professional, Definitely Scholarly Investigation)
Every January 20th, a sacred and slightly lactose-intolerant miracle occurs.
It is known as National Cheese Lovers Day — a day when people across this great land unite under one shared belief:
Calories consumed in the form of melted cheese do not count.
Now you might be wondering, “Carrie, what is the deep historical origin of this noble holiday?”
Excellent question.
The honest answer?
Nobody has the foggiest idea.
The Mysterious Origins of a Cheesy Holiday
Unlike Thanksgiving, which has pilgrims and pie, or Valentine’s Day, which has overpriced roses and questionable relationship decisions, Cheese Lovers Day appears to have been created by…
…someone sitting on a couch with a block of cheddar and a dream.
There is no ancient scroll.
No royal proclamation.
No statue of a founding father clutching a wheel of brie.
One day the internet simply woke up and said:
“You know what deserves a holiday? CHEESE.”
And America replied:
“Honestly, we’re shocked this took so long.”
The Real History of Cheese (Which Is Way Cooler Anyway)
While the holiday itself is basically a modern Hallmark-style invention, cheese has been around so long it probably predates pants.
Historians believe cheese was discovered thousands of years ago when some brave soul left milk in an animal-skin pouch and accidentally invented heaven.
Imagine being that first person:
“Hmm. This milk went bad and turned into a weird solid chunk.
I should probably… eat it?”
And thus began humanity’s longest and most committed love affair.
How to Properly Celebrate
There are many respectful, traditional ways to observe Cheese Lovers Day:
• Eat cheese
• Melt cheese
• Sprinkle cheese
• Shred cheese
• Order something just because it comes with extra cheese
• Whisper “I love you” to a charcuterie board
You can celebrate fancy with imported gouda and artisanal crackers.
Or you can celebrate like the rest of us — standing in front of the fridge at 10 p.m., eating shredded mozzarella directly out of the bag like a raccoon with dreams.
Both are valid.
A Word to the Lactose Intolerant
If you are one of those brave souls whose body rejects dairy like a bad ex, today is not your day.
But we see you.
We support you.
We will eat an extra slice in your honor.
In Conclusion
National Cheese Lovers Day may not have a dramatic origin story.
There were no battles fought.
No treaties signed.
No speeches delivered on the steps of government buildings while holding a grilled cheese.
But it does give us a perfectly legitimate reason to build a cheese plate at 9 a.m. and call it self-care.
And honestly?
That’s the kind of history I can get behind.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a date with some brie and a cracker.
Happy Cheese Lovers Day, y’all.
May your cheese be plentiful and your pants be forgiving.
🧀✨
💋✨Until next time... keep loving & living your best life!
🦋Wishing you Love, Light & Sparkles!
🌸 Carrie
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